How Do You Identify Your Breaking Point?
Breaking points are sneaky disrupters that lie in wait deep within all of us. In a state of uncertainty, there is no telling when they will bubble up. Sometimes they spill over in tears and sometimes they erupt like a volcano. When push comes to shove, we all have a breaking point. It often occurs when you reach the point of despair.
You lose hope that what could have been will ever happen. You feel as if your life is out of control and you can’t stop your hands from trembling on the steering wheel. There are often physical and mental symptoms. Your mind becomes foggy and your world feels like it is moving very fast, but you are not…you are moving in slow motion. It becomes increasingly difficult to make decisions and you constantly second-guess yourself. Things that you once did easily are now hidden behind a blanket of self-doubt, blame and failure.
Soon your physical health starts to decline as your mental state continues in its place of fragility and uncertainty. At this point, you move into numbness and feel completely powerless. You enter the state of being completely over-whelmed.
Have you experienced this at any point in your life? I have, and that is why I can describe it so vividly. I have also learned as a result of my own experience that breaking points can push you to discard all that you have worked on, or they can be the impetus to recycle yourself and start all over again.
My breaking point came four years into an initiative to develop a revolutionary analytic software and leadership solution to help organizational leaders coach and manage employee engagement while fostering leadership excellence.
My team and I put our hearts and souls into it, and I invested thousands of dollars to meet with a boardroom of savvy and high risk investors in New York as part of a campaign to try to generate an additional $1.5 million in phase 2 financing for my tech company. I was doing this while simultaneously building the technology and acquiring new customers for it.
In this instance, the potential investors said no, but not just no. They said “no way.” They turned on me with a force that drove me into the ground as they pounded out their reason for why they didn’t think the idea would work. They had big egos and there was a lot of them and one of me. When I left I felt beaten up and at my breaking point.
I lost my trip investment, and a lot of my self-worth that day. It was a trigger point that pushed me to ultimately abandon the project. I just couldn’t take any more negativity. I made the very tough decision to return full-time to my core business of motivational speaking, branding, and mentoring.
But I discovered in the process that breaking points can also be positive. Breaking points don’t have to be the force that breaks you. They can also be symbols of recognition that you can beat your competition, or emotional levers to push you to be your best. You will do better in business and in life if you can let go of your negative breaking points that tear down your confidence and make you feel inferior.
Instead, get rid of those thoughts that do not serve you in a healthy way. Let go of the patterns of behavior that aren’t getting you to your destination. If I had not faced my breaking point and let it go, I would have remained in a place of frustration, disappointment, anger and even rage. Instead, I chose to stop the decline and start living my life with more intention.
You can do that too. Recognize that sometimes it is okay to let something go if it means the restoration of your mental and physical health. Return to the world that engages you and brings you joy.
You deserve that in life.
Paula Morand, CSP is a leadership building, revenue boosting, strategy expanding keynote speaker, author and visionary. This dreaming big and being bold expert brings her vibrant energy, humor and wisdom to ignite individuals, organizations and communities to lead change, growth and bold impact. 23 years, 25,000 clients, 19 countries, 11 books, former radio personality, 10x award winning entrepreneur and humorous emcee.
To check out Paula’s newest book, “Bold Courage: How Owning Your Awesome Changes Everything” go to Amazon http://ow.ly/i8yW307ix67
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